'Of course I knew Martin was shagging someone the moment I found the Queen's Greatest Hits cassette in his car among the usual ones by Howling Dog Shannon and Stinkin' Feet Brown.'
Jess has just found out that the marriage made in heaven was knocked up from spare parts in the back room of Hell. Her first reaction is to smash plates, drink the entire contents of Martin's precious wine cellar and spend days face down on the kitchen floor. But life must go on. Starting by painting her bedroom orange and buying a pair of purple stilettos, Jess knocks the cake crumbs off her c.v. and abandons her idealised version of marriage and motherhood.
Stevie Morgan - the creator of the 'Beloved and Bonk' and 'In the Sticks' columns for the Independent - is the pseudonym of Nicola Davies, a zoologist and children's writer. She lives in Devon with her partner, her two children, one dog, and varying numbers of bantams and Shetland sheep.