Chart throb - Ben Elton

Chart Throb: the ultimate pop quest. Ninety-five thousand hopefuls. Three judges. Just one winner. And that's Calvin Simms, the genius behind the show. Calvin always wins because Calvin writes the rules. But this year, as he sits smugly in judgment upon the mingers, clingers, and blingers whom he has preselected in his carefully scripted "search" for a star, he has no idea that the rules are changing. The "real" is about to be put back into "reality" television, and Calvin and his fellow judges (the nation's favorite mom and the other guy) are about to become "ex-factors" themselves. Ben Elton returns to blistering comic satire with a vengeance in this no-holds-barred competition. One winner. A whole bunch of losers. Crazed, no-talent, fame junkies . . . and that's just the judges.