Hands up! - Paul Magrs

Frank Lurcher and Tolstoy the Long-Eared Bat! Twenty years ago they were the biggest names in ventriloquism with their TV show. But all good things come to an end. Now, Frank Lurcher's a washed-out, grumpy has-been and his scraggy puppet Tolstoy is stuffed away in a trunk in the loft. But trouble is brewing. Frank suddenly declares that his teenage son, Jason, must follow in the family tradition and get a puppet of his own! But someone's got a shrewd idea who that puppet should be. Someone with green eyes, moth-eaten velvety wings, a snarling snout and two extra-large pointy ears. . . Tolstoy is making a comeback - with Jason as his new chosen puppeteer. He's out for another shot at TV superstardom, and a gruesome revenge on the showbiz puppets and people that wronged him in the past. Can Jason fight his evil controlling power? Will the lovely Lisa Turmoil, hair-stylist to the stars, help him in his battle - or just go off and give someone a perm? And if you cook a puppet ostrich in a microwave oven, does it count as murder?