Oxford dictionary of humorous quotations - Ned Sherrin

This hilarious collection of humorous quotations, full of wisecracks and wit, snappy comments and inspired fantasy, has been specially chosen by Ned Sherrin. Now with even more quotes on more subjects: from Gambling to Hollywood, from Diets to Shopping. Find the best lines from your favourite jokesters and wordsmiths, add that extra something to a speech or presentation, or just enjoy a good laugh.'If God had wanted us to bend over, He would have put diamonds on the floor.' Joan Rivers on Health'It's hard to be funny when you have to be clean.' Mae West on Humour'Don't get mad, get everything.' Ivana Trump on Marriage'They misunderestimated me.' George W. Bush on Self-Knowledge'If it's shiny, I buy it.' Graham Norton on Shopping'Whales get killed only when they spout.' Denis Thatcher on Speeches