Self Portrait of Fear and Love - Robin Matteri

I've always written in a journal. I started sometime in high school writing long entries that detailed every last bit of information relevant to my life at particular moments. As I became more controversial in real life, the idea of leaving a trail of evidence seemed stupid. From that point on, I summarized my day, or the thoughts of a day, into words that ended up, sounding pretty cool. I always assumed they would one day be song lyrics, and that I'd be a singer. Thanks to my inability to learn how to play guitar, and lack of motivation to fit into a size two dress, I derailed that dream. As it turns out, these words document a sad journey of a girl who desperately craved love. I kept these words hidden for many years for obvious reasons --- it's embarrassing. Over time, I've realized, I am not alone. My self-portrait looks exactly the same as yours. Fear and love constantly collide. To be vulnerable is an art Poetry is the easy part ---Robin