The Penguin dictionary of modern humorous quotations - Fred Metcalf

What's the funniest thing you've ever heard? Who said it? Was is Oscar Wilde, P.G. Wodehouse (The Right Hon. was a tubby little chap who looked as if he had been poured into his clothes and had forgotten to say "When"!), Groucho Marx (A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running), Nancy Mitford (She said that all the sights of Rome were called after London cinemas), Lily Tomlin (Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain), Homer Simpson (To alcohol! The cause of - and solution to - all of life's problems!) or Joan Rivers (I don't exercise. If God wanted me to bend over, he would have put diamonds on the floor)? May be it was Noel Coward, Jack Dee, H.L. Mencken, Woody Allen or Rowan Atkinson? They are all here: over 5,500 quotations from the funniest people of the past hundred years.;The quotations are grouped thematically, covering catgories from abstinence, bosses and honeymoons (Honeymoon - the morning after the knot before) to wealth, wine and Yugoslavia, via creativity, pets (Springfield Pet Shop: All Our Pets are Flushable) and swimming (They say that swimming is great exercise. Have you ever seen a whale?). The result is a book which will give the reader a line for any kind of speech or simply provide hours of pleasurable browsing.;He who laughs, lasts - Mary Pettibone Poole.