12 signs you’re dating your phone
Phones have made our lives better. We can catch up with our friends whenever we want. We can fight boredom with an array of apps and games. We can even take funny little pictures of ourselves while no-one’s watching.
But has our relationship with our beepy little plastic friends gone too far? Are things getting a little bit…romantic?
Here are 12 signs you’re dating your phone.
1. You go to bed with it every night
It lives under your pillow, where you can be sure no-one will snatch it away from you and that it won’t sneak off for midnight liaisons with other smartphone addicts.
2. You’re inconsolable if you leave it at home
How are you supposed to live without your phone pestering you when someone likes that picture you took of breakfast this morning?
3. You love it despite its flaws
You cracked your screen over a year ago but you still haven’t got it fixed. Once you get past it, it’s still the same phone you fell in love with…erm, signed a contract for. The last one, not the love thing.
4. You’ve given it a pet name
You might think it’s a bit of innocent fun to call your phone ‘Sammy Samsung’, but your PDA is creeping everyone else out. Get a room!
5. You buy it a new outfit every couple of months
Ooh, wouldn’t it look cute in a nice little red number? You score extra weird points if you’ve bought it a special case for a specific event.
6. You can hear its voice, even if it isn’t speaking
You feel a slight tingle in your pocket, that familiar warm vibration of your phone telling you something has happened. But wait…there’s no notifications on your phone. Ah, that’d be the longing kicking in. It’s true love!
7. You take it to dinner and to the pub…
…so you can steal a few fleeting moments with it while your horrible distracting friends go to the toilet. Phones never have to go to the toilet. They’ll never let you down, or break up with you…
8. You never turn it off willingly
Because that would be like knocking a loved one unconscious, wouldn’t it?
9. You like to touch it a lot
Even if you aren’t actually reading anything on your phone, you still like to idly scroll through Facebook and Twitter with a gentle loving stroke across the screen.
10. You’ve bought one of these so you can take romantic baths and showers together
Okay, that’s a bit weird…
11. You can think of at least 2 friends you’d sacrifice before it
Well, you can’t play Candy Crush or upload Instagram photos on Dave or Maria, can you?
12. You complain about it to your friends, but you don’t know what you’d do without it
The surest sign of true love. Are those wedding bells we hear chiming?
If you’ve come to the sudden realisation you’re in a relationship with a piece of plastic (albeit a clever one), do the smart thing and sell it with musicMagpie. It’ll hurt at first, but you’ll realise you made the right decision in the end.